Episode Transcript
[00:00:04] Oh, my God. Hey, my friend. It's Dana. Welcome. This is Words that Move Me.
[00:00:09] This is our second to last episode of the year.
[00:00:15] Again, the fifth year, the second to last episode of the fifth year of Words that Move Me. I'm rocked by that to my core. And I'm also super excited to listen to this episode because usually when I record the introduction to every episode, the episode has just happened. But this episode is unusual in that it's been happening all year long. Every single guest that I have over the course of the entire calendar year answers the same question.
[00:00:43] Off record. Well, on record, but you've never heard this before.
[00:00:48] They all answered the same question. Every year I change the question and. And every year, all of my guests answer the same question, and every year, nobody answers it the same. So I'm thrilled to revisit every guest from this season from this year and really thrilled to share with you the answers to the question, when do you feel the most yourself?
[00:01:11] A person that I love deeply asked me this question once. I think we were walking to yogurt land when he asked me, and I think I answered cheekily when I'm at yogurt land, which isn't not true, but when do you feel the most yourself?
[00:01:27] I loved being asked this question and the journey that I went on in effort to answer it, and I think every guest this season felt the same way. I hope that you enjoy every guest's answer to this question and I hope that you find an answer for yourself.
[00:01:45] Oh, we didn't do wins, did we? Great. Well, but the win is that the win is that we've made it five calendar freaking years of almost weekly podcasts. I'm rocked. Riley Higgins. Could not do it without you.
[00:01:58] Words that Move Me. Community. Could not do it without you. Fiona Small. Couldn't do it without you. Ori. We couldn't have done it without you. Malia Baker. Also, thank you for your help in the early incubation phase of Words that Move Me.
[00:02:13] Courtney Darlington. Really, Truly, Max Winney and our music. Bri Reitz for the logo and brand design.
[00:02:23] There are also all of my dearest friends and people in my life who support me talking to a microphone whenever I'm not talking to them or a room full of kids or a set.
[00:02:34] And super shout out to my super new teammates and Kat Heinen and Ozzy, who are helping me with Words that move Me and some podcast socials moving forward.
[00:02:46] The team keeps growing. The podcast keeps growing. Thank you, listener, viewer, for loving us, for being here, for listening for viewing. And. And that's my room. How about you? What's going well? In.
[00:03:08] Yay.
[00:03:11] Congratulations. I'm glad you're winning. Riz is also thrilled. She's really, really wedged up here. She feels very cozy. I'm asking every guest to answer this question, and now I do. I have to answer it myself, don't I?
[00:03:27] Is it not the same?
[00:03:29] It is. I. When. When Daniel asked me this question, my answer was twofold. I always have two fricking answers. Dana. Two answers. Wilson. That's what we should call me.
[00:03:44] I do. I feel. But the question is the most yourself. I feel absolutely myself.
[00:03:54] It is a tie.
[00:03:55] When I'm performing, and certainly when I'm performing work that is in me, rehearsed a thousand times, known in my body to the point where my mind can be free, that is very myself. I feel very me when I'm there.
[00:04:20] And also when I am sitting alone on my couch watching a thing with Riz, not talking to anybody, not thinking about what I'm gonna say to anybody, but just being and receiving instead of pouring.
[00:04:42] I do feel very much myself in both pour and receive modes. And I think that's so interesting. It's so telling.
[00:04:52] Yeah. Neither one of those is more me than the other.
[00:04:57] I hope you enjoy answering this question for yourself. It's a toughie, man.
[00:05:01] But I do think more than usual. Our guests were quick to answer this one. I think we had way more. Oh, well, it's when I'm. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, versus in questions past people have had to ponder.
[00:05:14] So I do think there may be a guttural answer. You may be able to answer this one for yourself very quickly.
[00:05:21] But with that said, enjoy. Every guest from 2025 answering the question, when do you feel the most yourself?
[00:05:36] When are you most yourself?
[00:05:39] When are you the most yourself?
[00:05:41] I'm.
[00:05:46] Very interesting question. I don't think everyone's asked me something like that. When am I most myself?
[00:05:53] Huh? I mean, the first time I was asked it as well. Yeah. Only because it's, like, it suggests that I'm less myself. Right, right. Because. Because in. In certain aspects, I'm like, when am I. You know what? I guess I don't know if this is the right answer, but this is where I feel my most free, I suppose. And this is where my mind and my. My. I guess my perception on life and things are a little bit more, you know, connected, intertwined, and whatever is probably when I'm on a. I'm on, like, a high steep or a Hill. And I'm looking down at everything.
[00:06:31] Like when I'm in the midst of just nature and. And when you're elevated and I'm physical body is like my. And I'm physically elevated. I feel in my most. I feel in my most like, capacity of thought and perception and belief and movement. When I dance, I feel even more elevated and connected. When I do that, I feel my most self in that space. And I also feel the most.
[00:06:59] I get the perception of the world and realize that it's not as big as I think it is. When I'm down there in the midst of it all, everything feels so, you know, Imposing. Yeah. You know, and tight. And when you stand above it all, you start to realize how plausible and how possible everything is. Wow. I love that answer to this question.
[00:07:20] Thank you, my friend. Oh, man.
[00:07:24] I think when I let go of what other people expect of me and feel that how I show up is enough.
[00:07:34] It's just a lesson that I'll keep learning. It's just. I'll have it to keep learning. Remember you learned.
[00:07:38] Yeah.
[00:07:39] Thank you so much. Thank you, my friend. Beautifully said. Oh, cool.
[00:07:44] Wow.
[00:07:46] I feel the most. Ooh. I'm feeling like a couple things, which is cool.
[00:07:53] I feel the most myself with my family. Yeah. Always.
[00:07:58] Siblings, parents, cousins, auntie, uncle, grandma, grandpa. I feel the most myself when I'm with them. And I feel the most myself when I'm in nature.
[00:08:07] Mountains, ocean, lakes, desert, whatever. Outside, sun, clouds, rain, air. I feel the most myself because I think that's what we're closest to. I really do. You know yourself, Will.
[00:08:21] She's an indoor cat.
[00:08:23] Yeah. Dang. Okay. I mean, it's been a long time since humans lived outside. Feed in the sand, set on the feet. Feet in the sand is nice on a road, but sand in my mouth or in like my. Under my nails or in my places. I just. Not for me.
[00:08:42] That's fair. Beach is fun. Yeah, beach is fun. I've been try. Riley and I have made a few like beach hangs lately. Early morning. Oh yeah. I really love. That's the best. A couple hours early in the day. I don't need a full day. No all. Have you seen my skin? This. She's not made to be outside for very long. It's. It is. The sun is. It can be harsh. But man, the feeling of it on your skin for a second. Actually vitamin D is one of the things I was deficient, which I was surprised. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. I got my first showtime outside. But yeah, family and outdoors. Okay. Love that. Yes. When are you the most yourself?
[00:09:20] Don't say on a treadmill. I will lose it.
[00:09:24] But it might be right off the top of my head. Without thinking would just be when I'm in my apartment, when I'm home, just alone in my, like, safe personal space.
[00:09:38] I hear that, dude.
[00:09:42] Do you find I'll ask 100 questions. It's my podcast. I do whatever I want. Yes.
[00:09:48] A pressure around the social component of dance. Because I see you as high wattage and I know that the battery expires. And I know that to be on in a room full of 100 people, which we're often in, or an auditorium of 70,000, that you expire more quickly.
[00:10:12] Is that a thing you feel the social dance pressure?
[00:10:16] For sure. For sure. And I love it. And I.
[00:10:19] When I'm there and when I'm on the clock and doing that thing, it's a very real and exciting and genuine battery that is at 100. But I mean, yeah, absolutely. I'm actually not one. It's like a joke. I'm like the grandma.
[00:10:31] I'm not the one that's gonna go to the after dinner or the after party unless it's, of course, out of, like, respect for the event and everything. But if I have the choice, if the choice is given to me after that, like, 10 to 5 window of my work and my battery being at 100, I'm always the one that's like, you're going home. Love y'. All.
[00:10:51] See ya. I love that. I just, like, take care of myself. Nighttime boundary. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm a nighttime boundary. Nighttime boundary lady. I'm here for it. Yes. Your sister is really good at protecting her instrument. Are there any. Any other things that you do for yourself on tour or when you're on the road or even when you're in shows doing, you know, a really, you know, demanding schedule. Anything that you recommend to people.
[00:11:16] Like, just. Cause everything I do, I feel like I'm aware of what it's doing for me and gonna help. So in terms of, like, I make sure I pack all the products that I love, that I need to, like, help me. I don't know, you know, like the CBD cream for the body, the. Just anything that I know. Like my eye masks, like, every morning. Yes. I travel, I bring my whole pack of eye masks. Cause that is just what I need. Ten minutes of the eye mask, you know. Wow. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So, you know, it could be maybe viewed as, like, high maintenance. And I am a heavy packer, but I make sure I have. Whenever I travel the day, one day, two days a month, I'm going to pack everything I need. So that's kind of that. And then food wise, it's really important that I stick with my routine. So when I'm on the road, it's really hard. It can be, yeah. Really, really hard. And so that Bible Belt area especially. Yes, exactly. So I've found all my favorite kind of like food, like a protein bar or like tuna in a bag. Weird. That's what I do sometimes. It gets the job done. Yeah. Rice cakes. I pack my little like grocery bag wherever I go. Smart. And I allow myself to eat out and enjoy and like deal with and accustomed to where I am. I don't put a pressure on it, but I bring my, my backup, my plants that can be there for me when that will keep you covered at your baseline. Not going to get sick. Not going to have a weird guts night. Not going to. Oh, yeah, yeah.
[00:12:37] I'm curious about the bar. What's your favorite bar? The bar go macro. Oh, I love them. I love them. Yeah, there's. For a while I was trying a low fodmap thing and there's one of the go macros. I can't remember what color or what title it is, but one of them is on the low fodmap plan and that is my favorite one.
[00:12:56] Dates are not low fodmap and dates kind of can upset me a little bit. Yeah.
[00:13:01] Glad we had this talk work fierce. Okay, great. Love it. When do you feel the most yourself?
[00:13:13] When I'm cooking and cooking for other people.
[00:13:17] Yeah, I cook for myself, but when I'm cooking for other people, I feel most myself. I love that answer.
[00:13:26] When are you most yourself?
[00:13:32] Can be a place or a moment or the answer is choice. I can be myself fully in so many moments.
[00:13:39] I know for the first time it happened, it happened in a battle where I can see that could be fully myself. Didn't matter what I wore, what I was able to feel the way I could feel that day and just. Yeah. Fully myself after that.
[00:13:58] The performance, the stage. Yeah. You know, I can just be fully myself. I don't have to explain anything to anyone.
[00:14:06] You know, my performance can be interpreted in however they want. It's just myself. Yep. The audience is free to interpret, free to explore. And I think the other time is when I wake up in the morning and I play music, I'm fully myself. Like movement is not perfect. I lip sync, I do stupid movements. I move around.
[00:14:29] I can do that for a very long time. Actually, one time I did that for an hour. I was like, wow, okay, this is really who I am. Yeah, this is really who I am. Like, you know, like, I do. I'm in pajamas, and I start doing Runway, and then I play another type of music, and I'm living, and I. I encourage dancers to do that. Nice. To wake up in the morning and shake the anxiety off and just play any song that you feel. Lip sync. Move, go on the floor. Yes. Stupid moves. Allow yourself. Oh, thank you for that permission. Allow yourself to. To just feel and move and without focusing on perfection. Yeah. Without judgment of self. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, that's really what I like about. That's actually what I like now that I'm studying acting. That's what I like about acting is dancing has become so camera perfect. Like, going to an audition, your makeup has to be good, your outfit this. Blah, blah, blah. You get called out in the last group. You have to nail it. Yeah. But acting, not studying acting. Give another layer to it. And I think dancers should study acting more, because if you're tired that day, well, that's gonna. That's what's gonna feed your performance as an actor. Use it. Whatever you sad, use it better. It's gonna fit something, like.
[00:15:49] And being able to play different characters. So I think that's where.
[00:15:54] From dance transitioning to acting is fun because there's so many layers of your personality. Yeah. Your voice tone, like, you know, after a while, you crave expressing more than just throughout the body movement. So that's why in the morning, just shake it off. Yo, look at yourself and be like, hey, I look good. I feel good. Let's go.
[00:16:17] I feel the most myself when I am surrounded by people that I love.
[00:16:29] I think that that's it. As long as I am around the people that I love, whatever we're doing is probably good. I was about to go, like, more into the weeds of, like. But I. But no, I think as long as.
[00:16:42] Yeah. I think that that's when I'm like.
[00:16:46] Because I'm really good on my own, but I think I'm more myself when I can, you know, be considerate and. Yeah. Be thoughtful. I think that. I think so. Thank you for that. That's a gorgeous answer. When do you feel the most yourself?
[00:17:01] Every day.
[00:17:02] Every minute of the day.
[00:17:04] Yeah. I just started questioning myself in this question because it suggests that you might feel less yourself in certain moments. Right. But go to that question.
[00:17:13] When I'm by myself. Yeah.
[00:17:16] Like, every Day, all day long.
[00:17:19] But when I'm by myself, I don't thrive to be in crowds.
[00:17:25] And I'm most comfortable when I'm by myself. And this goes back to my childhood. Like, as a baby, my mom would say, you were okay. You were comfortable with me and your dad, but once you got outside of that, even my own family, she's like, nah, you wanted to be by yourself, huh? And I'm still like that. Wow. And it throws people off because they have this expectation of people in crowds and whatnot. I'm like, nah, where's the exit sign? Yes. And I'm not saying goodbye. I'm not saying goodbye. I'm out. I aspire to that level of greatness.
[00:18:02] I have to say goodbye to everyone. It takes an hour and a half. Nah. But it. You can be. I'm very much misunderstood by it. Like, I come in, I'm close to the exit. Cuz when I'm ready to go, I got to go. Smart. You should stand close to the exit tonight. See if that helps you. Oh, I'm always.
[00:18:18] I need you to write some techniques for a quick exit.
[00:18:21] Oh, that's fun. Yeah. Yeah. If I know I'm on the clock, I'll be going. Just leave. Just leave. I Just leave. Just leave. But that's what happens if I don't get to see. See them again, then you don't see them again. You should enjoy the time you was with them.
[00:18:34] Right. And that. That's club culture in me mostly because in the clubs, we ain't say goodbye, we just bounced. Yeah. See you. I'll see you next time. But I. But when I'm with you, I'm with you, and I take that away. I'm not ignoring you. I'm here, I'm present.
[00:18:50] So for me to leave, I'll see you next time.
[00:18:56] I mean, not while I'm talking on a podcast.
[00:18:59] That is the best answer to this question.
[00:19:04] That's it. Oh, that's so good.
[00:19:07] Not right now.
[00:19:09] Yikes. Yeah, that's one of those deep, like, prolific questions. Yeah, for sure. I do know the answer. And I have. Oh, go, go. When I'm creating in process.
[00:19:19] In process, absolutely. When I'm creating a show or.
[00:19:24] Yes. I feel the most myself.
[00:19:28] That's why we do it to be ourselves. Right.
[00:19:33] To express ourselves. Not to change the world a little bit.
[00:19:37] I don't think about the world. Okay.
[00:19:41] I don't.
[00:19:43] I really.
[00:19:44] Usually I just think about the task at hand. Yeah. Yeah. It doesn't get much bigger than that. For Me? Yeah. It's only after the fact that. That I'm like. And I hope it changes the world, and I hope that young people are better for it. Look, I hope I change one person or one person, really. It's. The world is just a. Is way too overwhelming. But I think just if you can touch one person, then you've done your job, right.
[00:20:08] Well, you did it. Good job, Trace. Yay. My. I guess my job's done. Yeah, you can, huh?
[00:20:18] I feel most myself when I'm dancing.
[00:20:22] It just.
[00:20:23] There it is. I do. Yeah, there it is.
[00:20:27] That used to be my answer, and now it's holding Riz and dancing with Riz. Then.
[00:20:33] Oh, you're tatty, Riz. You're so tanning. Oh, shake it, shake it. Yes. Good girl.
[00:20:42] I think it's exactly kind of what you're saying. I think it's two. There's two different times I feel the most myself. I either feel when I'm by myself, probably, like, running, walking, listening to music, no one else around, just me. Like, in my own, like, in motion. Feels important to say music on probably near water of some sort of.
[00:21:08] I feel the most kind of, like, grounded in that version of myself. But I do also think there's an interesting part of me that comes out. And I remember Cynthia and Ari said this to me, like, right after we started Wicked, they were like, you know that, like, you're really smiley and bubbly, but then the second you, like, click in, there's like, a different U turn. Oh, yeah. And I was like, that's a keen observation. Interesting.
[00:21:30] But I do think there is something, like when I'm in a rehearsal and the emails are done, the casting's done, the prep is done, the research is done, and you're just, like, in that room with those dancers. Like, to me, there's something else that just, like, takes over. And I do feel so yourself. Myself, but a very different version of myself than the guy who's, like, running on the west side highway with, like, funny listening to Renaissance, you know what I mean? But, like. But yeah, I think that there's that duality there for sure. When do you feel the most yourself?
[00:22:06] Good one, right? I feel the most myself when I'm by water with music and a good plate of spaghetti noodles. If I get real specific, that would be where I would feel the most. You know what's crazy? I almost said out loud, spaghetti and the beach don't mix. But my favorite spaghetti I ever had was, like, a squid ink pasta with marinara sauce. Yeah. On the beach. And it was so good. So it's great fantasy. I'm very much. Yeah, it's not a fantasy. It's when you feel the most. Yeah. Just food in general. Good food, beach music. Which explains why that Janet song is. Oh, speaks to you. Yeah, I'm life.
[00:22:50] God, it's so good.
[00:22:54] And even the interlude into it. The island. So good, Ang.
[00:22:58] Oh, my God. Why do I know it? Yeah. Oh, my God. Yeah. We both do. In an empty studio by myself.
[00:23:05] It's my therapy. It's my freedom. It's my.
[00:23:09] It's my sanctuary. It's where I go to when I'm having a good day or a bad day, and I can Just being there for hours. Nice. You answered that quick. That was like, front of mind. I mean, it's where I always go. I mean, a couple weeks ago, we had to put down my childhood dog. I am so sorry. And that was the first thing I texted sooner. I was like, can I please just go any space? Yep. And, like, I didn't cry all day the moment I got in the studio bald, because it was like, that was my safe space. And then I just moved. Yeah. And I. It's. It didn't necessarily have anything to do with my dog, but it did have everything to do with my emotions, and it definitely helped me heal and move through that challenging moment. Thank you for sharing that as well. That's important to remember.
[00:24:03] I was talking the other night about space and affordability, and I think I wish that there were more spaces that dancers could afford so that we could get past. Like, I need a place to submit this audition, but I need a place to make up a comp. I need to, like, I need a place to feel my feelings. Yeah. I need a place to, like, move through a loss or whatever. Like, that's so huge because, I mean, it's our home dancers. We spend so much time there, and it's our safest space and it should be treated as such. Yeah.
[00:24:39] Actually, my ex husband asked me this question once. We're still very close. We love each other a lot. And he asked us on a date. He said, when do you think you're most yourself?
[00:24:54] And it was. It took me a second to answer, and I answered with two different answers. One of them is while performing, and the other one is when I'm sitting on the couch by myself without anything. Like, not. Not Lord of the Rings, not severance, not anything, but just, like, really quiet solo moments. I actually can agree to that. To be honest, at the moment when you said that. I thought when I'm with my friends, I'm a person. When I'm with. Not like a different person, but I'm just, you know, a different piece of myself with someone else or whatever. I am my most self when I'm by myself. And I enjoy it. Oh, my God. I enjoy sitting down. This is great. This is great. I enjoy. See, I enjoy not being on.
[00:25:38] Like, I. Yeah. Not that I don't like to be, but I. I. And I just appreciate that time. Yeah. You know what I'm saying? Like, because being on, even at dinners or just out, like, it's. My voice is thrashed because I went out last night, not even to a club, but to Soho House. Because you wanted, like, mb and listen, I've got a very expressive face.
[00:26:03] I have been criticized for being too expressive. Really? Oh, yes. Oh, my goodness. Yes. She can betray me at times. I do think any strength, if overused, can be a weakness.
[00:26:13] But I just, like, I got home last night and just, like, was rubbing my face and it felt so good because I was like, oh, yeah. I have been animated for six hours. Yeah, that's. It does feel nice to, like, have a slack jaw.
[00:26:27] Yes. No, like, cheeks. Especially if I'm laughing or, like, just cheesing all the time. I'm, like, cheesy all the time. You know what I'm saying? Yeah. I love to sit still. Oh, my God. Yeah, it's. It's a great pastime. I love to go to the movies by myself.
[00:26:42] I enjoy alone time. And it's not that I'm like. I'm single, which is great. I enjoy it, though. Like, I do, too. It's fun. I do, too. It's. I like to laugh out loud by myself.
[00:26:54] Like, crack up in tears. We were together, but we're basically one person at this point. Yes. Last night, she almost crawled up the stairs. We were laughing so hard. She pitched over and I was wheezing. Y Like, we couldn't breathe. It was so good. Y and then later. This is the best time. Later, though, she was alone. Oh, she texted me this morning. I'm sorry. I'm telling your story. You can tell it. She's right here.
[00:27:24] I was, like, asleep, like, the closest to sleep as possible. And I remember.
[00:27:32] And I went into a fit by myself for, like, 10 minutes, giggling in bed by myself. I settled down. I had left the memory, and it came back to full. That's how you know it was funny. Really funny. Really funny.
[00:27:47] So, yes, I love that.
[00:27:49] No, I feel like I Love it when you're here. But it's nice to not have to explain that moment to somebody. Like, you start laughing out of nowhere like an idiot. Or you remember when you messed up on stage and you're like, oh, yeah, it's good to.
[00:28:00] I really like not having somebody there. It's like, what? Yeah. What was so funny? What'd you just think about? Because then you say it and it's not as funny. No, I just like, in the privacy of my own space. I get to relive it at its max. Yes. It's the best time I could do it naked.
[00:28:20] In nature.
[00:28:22] Get out of here.
[00:28:23] I was going to say in a pump.
[00:28:25] My guess was literally in a heel. No, I think that's the part of me. Well, those. The dualities, right? Yeah. Yeah. Those two sides, they. They're right here. Yeah. But if I had to say, like the true me, like the spirit me, the. The absolute me.
[00:28:42] Nature. But then quickly under, throw me in a cute fit and a heel with my hair done and my makeup done, then, yes, there's a whole other side of me that feels very in my bag.
[00:28:58] I'm the most myself when I'm still.
[00:29:03] Like when I'm sitting in meditation. My eyes are closed and it seems. It seems like nothing's happening from the outside, but so much is happening internally. And I'm so deeply connected to myself, but something beyond myself. That's where I experience the greatest truth.
[00:29:21] It's like I told you that before and you wrote that in a movie. I do this for a living. I teach this too, so. Got it. Got it. Okay. Perfect. Perfect. Yeah. It's just regurgitated material, you know, that makes so much sense. But although I was surprised to hear it, being a person who. For whom movement is so important.
[00:29:38] But movement is important because when you're still. Again, physical movement isn't happening. But then you start tuning into the subtle movements of energy and then you realize that everything is moving constantly. But you only realize that when you're physically. Still love that. Yeah.
[00:29:54] I really feel the most myself when I am listening to music, surrounded by nature and by my loved ones. So whether that's like drive down the pch, which hopefully can happen soon, or I know.
[00:30:09] Or on a hike, like, just like truly, that is like, that's when I feel the most. Not even myself, but like, most alive. I want you to know you brought this rain today. Pacific Northwest. So comforting, isn't it? You're responsible for this. I have a question for you. Do you own an umbrella I know you don't. Oh, my God, I'm so glad you asked that question. I know you don't. Wait, that's so funny. I reluctantly bought one in New York last year. Shitty. $5 shitty. From. Yes, from CVS. And my friends will know I, like, hate using it. I say, like, don't call, don't text me when I have this umbrella.
[00:30:48] Yeah. So I do have one, but I don't. You better believe I did not use it today. That's right. And won't use it this week. That's right. I'd rather just wear a rain jacket, if anything. Rain jacket. That's so funny that you know that. How do you know that?
[00:31:00] My best friend, Jillian, if you are from Oregon, you don't use umbrellas. It's embarrassing. Yes, it's embarrassing. It's embarrassing. Be that guy. When do you feel the most yourself?
[00:31:16] Definitely in a dance space.
[00:31:19] Out of competition, in the club, in the rehearsal space. Like, I really feel like.
[00:31:28] Yeah. I mean, because eventually, like, I've adapted into that space where it's like, oh, yeah, I belong here, you know, so. So, yeah, those spaces, I feel like, I don't know, very empowered, you know, it's like in a rehearsal space of like, oh, I got cold here for a reason. There's something I bring to this collective, you know. That's a strong thought.
[00:31:52] Yeah, yeah. Because I mean that you're only getting asked to be there if you're needed. Yeah, yeah. And so you feel the most yourself when you feel needed or called to be. Like, called to be somewhere. Yeah. Well, just in that space, because, I mean, you know, in a. In a. In a club or. But you also feel called to be there.
[00:32:13] Yeah, the music.
[00:32:15] Yeah, the music. I'm sorry for la, by the way. It's just not New York. It is. It's just not New York. I'm so sorry, though, though. I've. I've been able to find places and spaces where I could enjoy myself. Okay. I. I will not compare it to New York because it's hard. It's a hard to do, you know, But I've been able to find little pockets of. Of, you know, situations. And the good thing is that DJs always travel here.
[00:32:49] So you always have an opportunity. People come to la. Yeah. So you always have an opportunity to hear some good music, depending on who's in town, for sure. Thank you for that. Silver lining. Yeah, yeah. I know it's not the same. Oh, no, I know it's not the same. But I do I, I've heard that once upon a time it was really dope here.
[00:33:08] I was such a rule follower when I got to la. And I didn't go out at all in Colorado where I'm from, but I moved to LA. I was 18. And so in my formative years of like studying with Marty and being introduced to K Mel and people who challenged my position of privilege by saying like, oh, you're not an actual dancer, you're just a computer. You just regurgitate what other people throw out at you. Why have I never seen you at a club if you're a dancer? How have I never seen you? Yeah, and my answer to that question was like, well, I'm not 21 yet, so I can't go out.
[00:33:47] Hysterical.
[00:33:52] It's so funny, it's so funny to think back on it, but I didn't go out in those years because I didn't drink, I didn't do drugs, I didn't, I couldn't get in places and I wasn't comfortable like breaking the rules. I just, I just wasn't. I still am a bit of a rule follower.
[00:34:12] For better or for worse.
[00:34:14] Yeah, let them know, Riz. Just let them know.
[00:34:18] She's, she's, she sending the message. She's the mayor of this town.
[00:34:25] So there were a few like in between 21 and like 24 where there were a couple. There was a lounge, like a, like a cool ass place in Pasadena. I forgot what it's called, but it was very low key.
[00:34:41] Some furniture like on the periphery, but a lot of standing room and great fucking music. But like kind of expensive drinks, Pasadena crowd, but really fucking good music.
[00:34:53] And people went there to dance. It was not club. You didn't go, go there to like pop bottles. Pop bottle, yeah. There's no chicks with sparklers. I hate that shit. It was a lounge. It was a lounge. And then there was another place in Hollywood that Marty would go sometimes. I only ever went like twice with him to this place in Hollywood. I don't even remember their names. I've not been a big no because that's, that's still a thing. This place is long gone. Whatever is the place Marty went to, what's it, what's the party that everybody, everybody talks about this. There's, it was like decades ago, but I don't know. I've. I've had a very small handful of good nightlife experiences in la.
[00:35:40] The majority of me learning myself in a cipher in a room with other people who aren't wearing fancy shoes.
[00:35:51] Is Funkbox in New York.
[00:35:53] That's my only. That's. That's. That was Voodoo Ray's party there. Yeah, that makes sense. And that's. That's the place where, like, a lot of who Samo is became like, I became. I wonder if we ever overlapped there, but just never met. Very likely.
[00:36:10] Very likely. I was there religiously. Yeah, Yeah, I was there trying to not be the first to burn out. I have a friend, Cindy Salgado, who ironically, is a dance studio trained.
[00:36:28] She's a. She's a member of one of the most notorious contemporary companies in America called Kid Pivot.
[00:36:36] And yeah, she's. She's classical down, but loves all dance.
[00:36:45] All dance and would smoke anybody at Tango, at House, at Lindy Hop, at like, she would shoot me for a second. She's like, no, I'm a beginner. She's nasty. She goes down. She was my in to Funkbox, of all people in the world, a ballerina, more or less. And she.
[00:37:07] I remember I would have, like, my best rounds, if you would call it that, at like, midnight.
[00:37:14] Hers came at four in the morning and I just. Midnight was like, oh, we're just early. Midnight's early. People are arriving and I'm like, ooh, I'm slick.
[00:37:24] The prime time is like 1am And. And I'm really struggling to stay awake at 2. And she's like, just getting warmed up. And it's 4, and I'm like, cindy, I think I have to go. Yeah. And she's like, why? It's just getting good. Yeah, prime prime time was like midnight to like, two, three. Yeah. Oh, my God. I. I remember one of the lies that I told myself around that time is I peak too early. And I told myself that about my career. I told myself that about how I freestyle and interact with social dance. They're not true. It's just. Maybe I should wake up later on those days, dude. That's what I'm saying.
[00:38:03] Anyways, great job. Thanks for being here. You're great. You're great. You're really great. I could really do that for way more hours.
[00:38:13] I think I feel most my. It's not just one thing. Okay. Can I give you a couple? Totally.
[00:38:19] I feel most myself when I'm, like, with someone, I love a friend and just like, laughing my head off and like, saying what I want with no judgment and just like, going off.
[00:38:32] I feel like myself. Yeah, I feel like myself when I'm in the ocean and I'm surfing and there's this thing that's so much bigger than me.
[00:38:43] I will say that, you know, I don't fuck with the ocean like that, but even being near it. Yeah. Being reminded of my scale, like. Yeah. Like the whole, like, grain of sand thing, like, you're just. I'm reminded daily that, like, I'm powerless and.
[00:38:58] And life is meaningless, and I mean nothing.
[00:39:02] Which is a totally hot perspective, everyone. Yeah. And then, like, the other one would be when I'm. When I'm deeply enjoying music and whether that's, like, dancing or just enjoying music, like a good Drake song. No, I'm kidding. I'm kidding.
[00:39:15] I don't listen to Drake. I don't. Beautifully played. I don't listen to Drake.
[00:39:19] Not in your room. No. I just. Guilt. Yeah. Yeah. Anyway. Yeah. But, yeah, like, when I have experiences with music, like, there's certain music that I'm just, like. It's. It's.
[00:39:29] But I guess, like, expressing yourself through art in general, I feel like myself. And when you're in that flow state and you kind of forget where you are.
[00:39:36] Yeah, yeah, yeah. Good answers.
[00:39:42] Mm.
[00:39:44] Oof.
[00:39:45] Yikes. Right?
[00:39:46] I most myself when I'm around.
[00:39:53] People who are unafraid.
[00:39:56] And I think that means to me, like, usually it's like my sister or Kiara or China. They are unafraid in their delivery.
[00:40:05] They are open with me. I. I am.
[00:40:09] I feel like I am built for tough.
[00:40:13] So I like honesty.
[00:40:17] Sometimes, if it's not the prettiest people who are not afraid to make mistakes in front of me or not be the most prettiest version of themselves. I. I'm a person who, like, aesthetically, I like. I like clothes. I like fashion. So I think a lot of people take me away from a certain way first value at face value. But I think I am.
[00:40:39] I relate to the depth of a human.
[00:40:43] And I think that is, like, on the couch in front of the television, stripped, stripped down, no pomp and circumstance, shooting the shit with your girlfriends. That's when I'm most myself, I think. Yeah. When are you most yourself?
[00:41:00] Oh, when am I most myself is when I'm around good people. Like, I have so many. Like, it's. Honestly, in any space I walk into and I see people and there's music and I see. I feel the energy, and it's good in that space.
[00:41:22] Oh.
[00:41:23] Like at the event, to just segue into that. There was a woman. She.
[00:41:27] She had. I don't know how old this woman was, but her and her husband, I know, did not come to see the show, but they were Just there in the space. Was she in black pants and a black and white sweater? She was. I saw her getting the. When I tell you, the minute I saw her, I said, that's gonna be my friend tonight. Yes. But I went up to her and I'm sitting up there and I'm like dancing with her. And she danced with me. And she was having the best time of her life. Time in her life. I walked away shaking it, shaking it, dropping it, shaking it, shaking it, you know, shaking her tail. Well, you bend over, let me see you shake it. Anyway, so she came up to me like, you know, a little bit before the show was about to start, and she said, hey, can you come dance with me so my husband can record? But I just want to dance with you. Is that okay? I said, ma', am, yes. I may have said, hell yes, you probably did. Went over there and we danced and I had the mic. I'm hyper, hub. She hyping me up. Husband over there record. He doing a little. A little jig. I. The footage looks like, look, that's exactly how it look. But those are the moments. Those are the moments that I live for because we. That event may have made their night. Like, they came out their week, their month, their year. She'll remember that they're watching that footage right now. You know, that's probably what they doing. And probably going over the moves because I told a couple, I think I told them maybe two. She taught me some too. But those are the moments when people are coming into an event that they may not have known even existed. And they came in and they had. People came in and had a good time. I want to leave a smile in every room I step into. If I can do that for the rest of my life, I'll be a happy woman.
[00:43:03] Well, I think you certainly just did. I hope so. It's a lot of, you know, thank y' all for being here, you know, now that I have your attention. Yeah, go for it. I just want to tell you, be the best you you can be, because ain't but one you.
[00:43:19] And when I tell you that one you is all you need because it's. Everybody already got theirselves. It's enough copies of this and that. You being you is your flex. I'm telling you.
[00:43:30] I'm telling you.
[00:43:32] I feel like. I feel like. I really believe you when you say it like that.
[00:43:37] Because I mean it from the bottom of my heart. Self. And it's a long time outfit to learn. Holy shirt and your. I need a pocket Lisa. Yes, it takes people a long time to realize that because that is your biggest flex that you can have to be wholly yourself, yourself. But some, it takes people sometimes a minute to get there. Yes. A life. A life. I know some grown ass adults. Yeah. Who are still chipping away. Exactly. Exactly. And I will say, like, I'm happy that I feel like I'm finally in my big age figuring that out and found it. And yeah, I'm me wherever I go.
[00:44:15] And I love it because I go home feeling good about feeling good, like you love me or you hate me. Not everybody's gonna love you, not everybody gonna like it. But at the end of the day, as long as you go home knowing, like, look, I went out there and did the best good I can be and be the best I can be and been myself in every step of the way, that's it. That's it. That's it. This podcast was produced by me with the help of many Big, big love to our executive assistant and editor, Riley Higgins. Our communications manager is Fiona Small with additional support from Ori Vajadares. Our music is by Max Winnie, logo and brand design by Bri Reitz. And if you're digging the podcast, leave a review and rating and please share. Also, if you want to connect with me and the many marvelous members of the Words that Move Me community, visit Words that Move me dot com. If you're simply curious to know more about me and the work that I do outside of this podcast, visit thedanawilson.com.
